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The End Done Right
by Vamphile
Chapter Twenty-Two
After five days together Brian and Justin were both sick. They were sick of strip monopoly, sick of strip trivial pursuit, (although Brian was surprised at how much useless knowledge the punk kid had in his head), and almost sick of each other.
The men were debating between Chinese and Pizza, and they were definitely sick of both of those options, but Justin still wasn’t okay standing for more than a few minutes at a time, which made cooking impossible. Lindsay was usually there to help with lunch, but they’d eaten just about everything edible in the house, and were out of ideas for dinner. Justin tried to say something about skipping dinner entirely but Brian's face made him stop mid sentence. He wasn’t in the mood to argue, he’d eat something, even if he couldn’t hold it down. It was still an effort.
They were arguing over nothing in particular when the doorbell rang.
“Mikey, so nice of you to stop by, uninvited.”
“Well, we figured you would be sick of all your take out options so we brought you Burgers, and Fried chicken.” Michael raised the greasy bags and the chicken bucket enthusiastically.
“And Thai” Ben said, leaning in with a bag.
“Mikey, how nice of you to stop by uninvited.” this time there was no sarcasm in Brian's voice, and he moved to allow the couple entrance.
They followed him to the den.
“Well, if you brought the Thai food then let me provide…”
Brian went into a drawer in his desk and removed the silver canister with a flourish
“The Thai stick.”
They laughed, and spread the food out on the coffee table while Brian expertly rolled a couple of joints.
He took a toke and passed it to Michael who inhaled deeply and tried to stop coughing. “Shit, this is strong.”
Brian said nothing but honestly wished that Mikey would remember that he only bought the good shit. Michael always ended up wasting the first toke. Michael passed it to Ben and Brian raised an eyebrow as he watched the professor take a healthy amount into his lungs. “Why professor, I didn’t know you indulged.” “I’m not this paragon of virtue you all seem to think.” Ben said smiling, as he passed the joint to Justin, who inhaled deeply and then passed it back to Brian.
Brian took a hit, and then another before passing it along, the second hit he shared with Justin, who shared it right back, until there was very little smoke to exhale. Brian loved getting stoned that way, more than just the almost kiss was the fact that the amount of oxygen one took in from someone else’s exhale just made the buzz hit faster and stronger.
“You know.” Ben started, “there are entire religions based around the use of marijuana to achieve a feeling of closeness and openness to the world around them.”
Brian snorted, “Yeah, that’s why I get stoned, to be one with the world.”
“You get stoned because then you don’t feel guilty about eating fried chicken.” Michael said.
”That too.”
Soon they were all baked, and digging into the billions of calories spread across the table.
Ben was sitting next to Justin now, and trying to explain to him the importance of being balanced and centered. Brian was lounging on the floor, Michael leaning against him. “You know you’re boyfriend’s full of shit.”
“He’s my husband.”
”You know your husband’s full of shit.”
“Yeah, I do.” Michael laughed,
“You know your twink is a drama princess.”
“He’s my…Justin.”
“You know your Justin’s a drama princess.”
“Yeah I do, I think he may have even graduated to drama queen last week.”
Justin, hearing his name turned, and when he heard the last part of the sentence he stuck his tongue out at Brian, which struck the man as so funny he had a difficult time not laughing.
Justin decided that if anyone could settle the argument about Luke and Leia, it would be Michael, so he brought up the subject. Which led to a long monologue by Michael about the force and how Luke would have instinctually known it wasn’t right between himself and Leia, and then he was putting in the DVD to illustrate his point with specific scenes. Which only made Brian glare at Justin, until they both started laughing.
Ben was still trying to prattle on about some deep spiritual bullshit but he got sidetracked by the idea of oneness with everything and started to go off on a tangent about oneness with people being different than oneness with inanimate objects or animals. Ben wasn’t making any sense, but Justin found it oddly calming to just listen to his voice, maybe it was because he’s heard no one’s voice but Brian's in so long.
“I’ve got it!”
Brian yelled and Justin startled.
“Do you have syphilis again?’ Justin asked, because if you do…” he waggled a finger at Brian.
Brian dismissed Justin's finger waggling with a glance. ”I know what we should do with the dungeon.”
“You have a dungeon?” Ben asked.
“We have a parlor, but he likes to call it the dungeon, I think we should make it a library.”
Brian threw down a piece of chicken, “if I keep eating like this I’m gonna get all old and fat, we need to build a gym.”
“Yeah, but we should put it in the unfinished room in the attic, or finish out that part of the basement, we can’t turn the parlor into a gym.”
”Why not?”
Justin shrugged, “it’d be tacky.”
“You think I’m tacky?” Brian tried to look hurt, he was honestly too stoned to be anything other than amused.
“No I think….” Justin was seriously stoned, “fuck, I don’t remember what I think, but if it’ll get you to go through those boxes, I’ll say okay to a gym.”
“We’ll just put the boxes in the attic.”
“What boxes?” Michael asked.
“Brian’s loft is in the parlor.”
”I thought Brian's loft was here in the den.” Ben said.
“No, this is loftesque. The actual stuff from his loft is in the parlor, and he won’t go through the boxes.”
“There’s probably some really cool shit in there.” Michael said.
“Nothing I need.” Brian shrugged.
Michael rolled over so he was lying almost on top of Brian. “Brian, that’s your stuff, from your home, you’re just willing to give up all of that?”
“Mikey, its just stuff, that I don’t think about until blonde boy over here starts nagging.”
“I don’t nag, that’s your department.” Brian stuck his tongue firmly in his cheek and smiled. “You nag, you just don’t do it as well as I do.”
”Pfft, you just think that you nag better because you think you do everything better.”
“Not everything, you’re a much better…bottom.”
Michael, in his hazy state of mind caught a nuance of this “better? As in you’ve compared?”
”What?” Brian looked at Mikey. “Well if he’s better then you must know how you’d do so when do you ever bottom huh?”
Justin smiled, wanting to se how Brian got himself out of this one, and Brian suddenly wondered when Michael had become insightful… he’d have to keep the good shit away from Mikey if he was going to actually start getting a clue when he was stoned.
“In college” Brian said, rolling his eyes.
Justin bit his lip, he would love to argue the point but if he ever ever ever wanted to fuck Brian again, he knew he could say nothing.
“Oh” Michael said, letting the subject drop. Brian heard a sort of low murmuring sound, and realized Ben was still talking, at length, to no one in particular. “Christ, no wonder he’s tenured, anyone who can go on for that long about nothing must be a brilliant professor.”
Now it was Michael’s turn to laugh uncontrollably. When he finally pulled himself together he said “well, he has equally good stamina in bed, so I just ignore him when he starts rambling.”
Brian nodded knowingly. “I agree, when they start rambling in bed, it’s best just to ignore them or shut them up.”
“Hey!” Justin said, “I don’t ramble.”
“No, you babble.”
“I don’t babble either.”
“So then, Daph and I were going to the mall but she forgot all her money and my wallet was in the car but when we were checking out the stuff at banana republic we came across this killer sweater and I wanted it but she said it was better for her and then….” Brian rambled in a poor imitation of Justin, using a falsetto voice and a speaking manner more like Gus’s than Justin's.
Justin threw a pillow at his head. “Like you never say odd things in bed.”
Brian gave him a warning look.
“What does he say?” Ben asked, pulled out of his little diatribe on the condition of the hybrid potato crops.
Brian looked at Justin, waiting to see what he would reveal, as he casually took another hit, without removing his hazel eyes from the blue ones across the room. Justin shrugged. “Nothing, he just mumbles grocery lists and random advertising mottos in his sleep.” Brian smiled; sometimes having a …Justin who could lie well was handy.
Michael shrugged, taking another hit before passing the weed back to Ben. “That’s nothing, I’ve heard him rattle off the entire starting lineup for the Steelers.”
“When did I do that?”
”One of those nights after seeing your dad.”
Brian shrugged again. My dad would never shut up about the Steelers, it’s like he never got over that time during the war when there weren’t enough men so the Steelers and the Eagles had to merge. He talked about it like it was the fucking end of the world.”
Brian sat up, reaching for something…he finally found it and took a long pull off a bottle of beam.
Justin was going to say something about not drinking right out of the bottle but decided against it and went back to slouching, eyes half closed, and letting Michael and Brian reminisce.
They did it oddly, Michael bringing up stories, Brian correcting his version of them, and then the two of them agreeing, seemingly only upon who they hated in school, (everybody), who they had thought was hot, (Patrick Hannigan and Tony Rinaldi), and which teachers were gay (the gym coach and their 11th grade science teacher).
Justin was trying to pay attention but he couldn’t. “I need chocolate.” He said, getting up to go and find his stash in the studio. Brian would never admit it, but he couldn’t resist chocolate, and so every time Justin bought any it was gone, that’s when he’d started locking it in the studio fridge.
The minute he stood up he realized it had been a mistake. A pain shot through his foot. He sat back down.
Brian looked at him suddenly concerned “Are we out of chocolate?”
Justin laughed, “No, it’s in the studio fridge.”
“Give me the key.”
Justin shrugged “I think I left it upstairs.”
Brian sighed “fine.” He got up and walked over to a videocassette box that was in the drawer under the TV. The case was for the movie “chocolat.”
“Um Brian, I wanted actual chocolate, not a movie about a guy who eats chocolate, even if it is Johnny Depp.”
Brian just looked at him and opened the case to reveal ghiardhelli dark and milk chocolate squares.”
”You hide chocolate from me?”
“You lock YOURS in the studio.”
“That’s because you eat all of it if I don’t.”
“You’re the one that eats all the chocolate, that’s why I hide mine from you.”
“I can’t believe you’re keeping chocolate secrets, that’s just so wrong.”
“And I can’t believe you won’t share your hazelnut milk chocolate bars with me, and keep them locked away, that’s wronger.”
“Wronger isn’t a word.”
They two continued to bicker until Ben broke in.
“Hey, hey hey! You two are missing the most important point.”
Both Brian and Justin looked towards Ben.
”There is chocolate.”
They both laughed, and Brian poured the silver and gold wrapped squares over the coffee table. They all leaned in to take one, and Brian padded up to the kitchen, retrieve glasses and the gray goose from the freezer. Some people insisted that chocolate went with milk; Brian knew better, chocolate required ice-cold vodka to be savored properly.
When they awoke the next morning they were both a little hung over.
“Last night was nice, it’s good to see you and Michael getting along again.” Justin said
“I think he may have actually grown up.”
“Right because that was the problem HE was too immature.”
“Are you calling me immature?”
“Take it as a compliment.”
”Whatever, I’m just glad Michael is off your case.”
“Uggggh, I so don’t feel like getting out of bed.”
“We don’t have to.”
Justin moved himself against Brian, savoring the feel of their skin against each other. “Mmmmmm, you’re right we don’t. I don’t actually even remember coming to bed last night.”
“That’s because you took your Ambien with a double vodka, and I had to carry you.”
“Sorry.”
“You’re not allowed to use that word.”
“I apologize” he made each syllable distinct.”
Brian kissed the top of Justin's head, because it was the part of him closest to his mouth at the moment. “I think the gym idea was actually a good one though”
“I still think it should be in the attic room.”
”Fine, but I want to get started, I can’t just skip the gym for weeks every time you have a breakdown.”
Justin leaned up on one arm and looked at Brian. “Do you really think I’m gonna have another breakdown?”
Brian shrugged, I’m just saying IF you did, I’d hate to get fat because of it, or lose my muscle tone.”
Justin settled back onto Brian's chest. “So who does one call when one wants a state of the art work out facility installed into their home?”
“One does NOT call Gregory, I don’t need all my equipment to be color coordinated and named after fruits and vegetables.”
“I’ll do some research today after I’m done in the studio.”
“The studio?”
”Yeah, it’s been a while, and I really should start back to work, you know, there is the possibility that my things will sell enough to warrant a second show sometime in my life.”
“But you’re not gonna do that thing again right?”
”What thing?”
Brian rolled his eyes, “That thing where you almost kill yourself.”
“Oh, that thing…no, I tried that, it pissed a lot of people off.”
“Okay you go work in the studio, I’ll research what we need for a good home gym.”
They both continued to lay in bed, neither moving.
“You know, I think we actually have to get out of bed to do those things.”
Brian rolled over on top of Justin, “then fuck the research and the studio.”
Justin leaned up to kiss Brian, and was still amazed that even his hangover morning breath tasted sexy.
Hours later Justin went to the studio, his feet feeling a little better. He sat down and contemplated his next piece.
Brian tried to pretend that he was okay with Justin being in the studio again, he knew he should be, but he was still worried. He idly scrolled through the Williams Sonoma site until he found the pattern they had and ordered more dishes; he’d been meaning to do that for almost a week.
He really did think putting a gym in the house was a good idea, but he just couldn’t summon the energy to even start researching the project. He was deciding what the first step should even be when the phone rang.
“Were you even going to tell me something was wrong?”
”Mother Taylor?”
”Don’t play cute with me Brian, let me talk to Justin.”
“He’s in the studio.”
“Just go get him.”
Brian knocked on the door, but Justin probably couldn’t hear it, the music was blaring. He tried the knob. It was unlocked. Surprised, he walked in and handed Justin the phone, It’s your mother, she’s pissed.
“Hi mom.”
”Don’t hi mom me, when were you going to tell me?”
”Tell you what?”
“I was talking to Daphne and apparently you’ve been sick and didn’t bother to even let me know.”
”I haven’t been sick, I had…” Justin wasn’t sure what he’d had.
“I was exhausted, and I guess the pressure of the show got to me.”
“Exhaustion does not cause you to require stitches in your hand, or for Brian to take ten days off to take care of you.”
“He took off because he wanted a vacation.”
“Justin don’t bullshit me, I’m your mother.”
”Really? I’d forgotten.” Justin was trying for glib, Jennifer was in no mood.
“I’m coming over to see you today.”
“Today’s not good, I’m working.”
“I thought you were taking time off.”
“I took time off, now I’m back working.”
Jennifer sighed, “Justin sweetie, I worry about you.”
“I’m fine, I promise.”
”Why don’t we meet for lunch tomorrow.”
Justin's heart felt tight, his breathing shallowed. “Not tomorrow, we’ve got plans.”
“Well, then Sunday lets have brunch.”
“Okay why don’t you bring what’s his name here, we’ll have brunch, you’ll see I’m fine.”
Jennifer was silent for a moment.
“Mom?”
”What’s his name and I aren’t together anymore.”
“Good”
“Justin.”
”Right, I’m supposed to be upset by this. Lets pretend I am.”
“Justin!”
“What do you want me to say?”
”Say that 11 is good for brunch.”
“11 is good for brunch.”
“See you on Sunday.”
Justin limping only slightly brought the phone back to Brian. “We’re having my mother for brunch the day after tomorrow.”
“Sunday brunch with the in-laws, how…”
“It’s just her, she broke up with that kid.”
Brian chuckled, “I can not believe you have an age issue thing after your mother was most un-mom like about you and your gross old boyfriend.”
“No one ever thought you were gross or old.”
”Right they just thought I was ‘inappropriate”
Justin shrugged “You were, but that’s why you’re so very irresistible”
Brian rolled his eyes, you know cute and flattering isn’t going to make me feel better about brunch with the mother in law.”
“What would make you feel better about it?” Justin asked absently as he looked over Brian's shoulder at the gym equipment on the screen. “I like that one.” Justin pointed.
“Good to know, and what would make me feel better is not having to be here.”
“You don’t, she’s mad at me for not calling after the um…thing”
“Thing?”
The thing where I broke all the plates and lost my mind”
“Oh, that thing, yeah, you probably should have called her, you’re a terrible son.”
Justin laughed, “Fuck you, she’s madder at you.”
“Oh, then I’ll definitely stay for brunch, nothing beats eggs benedict and nagging, they’re a magnificent combination.”
”Shut up I’m gonna make a quiche.”
“Well yeah, quiche and nagging complement each other well, um, what were you planning on using for plates.”
“That’s kinda why I’m out here, we need to go back to the store.”
”I just ordered them online, they’ll be here next week.”
“Brian we’ve been eating off of paper plates all week, or out of take out boxes, I can not serve my mother brunch on paper plates.”
“Can you serve her out of a takeout box?”
”You know where there are probably dishes?”
Brian gave him a warning glance, knowing where he was headed with this. “Where?”
Justin leaned in and nibbled on Brian's ear, whispering “In the parlor.”
“Fuck you” Brian swatted him away. “Go back to the studio, I’ll go buy us a fucking box of dishes, but now we’re going to have service for 16, and that’s just overkill.”
Brian grabbed his keys and his wallet and headed to the garage.
Justin went back to the studio, he was going to stretch a canvas for a large piece, he felt like it had been years rather than just days since he’d last been in the place, but that was also because sometime in the past week Brian had let the Magdalena in and everything was so neat, all the overflowing ashtrays and empty water bottles were gone.
The room was dusted, and everything was put where it belonged. Justin lit a cigarette, grabbed a bottle of water and locked the door. He lost himself in thought as he stretched the canvas. Brian obviously had some issue about the boxes, or what was in them, and Justin was too curious to let it drop, but he wasn’t sure how far he could push him right now. He’d put him through a lot since they’d been back together. On the other hand, he really thought a library would go well in that space. Much better than some dusty old boxes full of god knows what.
Justin pulled the quiche out of the oven; his feet practically healed now. He was cutting up some fruit, and pouring the juice from the carton into a pitcher when the doorbell rang.
Brian opened the door to an ambush.
Justin served the food and they were all sitting and eating in silence when Debbie started. “When the fuck were you going to tell us?”
“Deb,” Jennifer put a hand on her arm,
“No, fuck respecting their privacy, Brian, you should have told us.”
Brian had been waiting for the outburst, the moment he saw Deb at door with Jennifer he knew that this may be more of a lynching than a brunch. He would have left if he didn’t think that they’d simply jump on Justin instead, and while he seemed to be recovering, Brian wasn’t sure how much double team mothering Justin was up for, so he threw himself on the grenade.
“I had it under control.” He said keeping his expression blank.
“Brian, no one doubts that you think you can control everything but I’m his mother, I had a right to know.”
“What was I supposed to do Jen?”
“Well, you could have tried a fucking phone call asshole” Deb broke in “I had to hear it second hand from Ben.”
“So are you worried about Justin or just pissed off that you were out of the loop?”
”Both!”
“Honestly Brian” Jen cut in “you could have called. I would have been happy to help.”
Brian rolled his eyes, “I was busy.”
”Busy taking care of Justin. I’m his mother, I could have helped.”
Justin sat in silence toying with the food on his plate. “I’m fine.”
“Oh sweetheart we know you’re fine now, but we’re still worried. I was thinking maybe you should go see a counselor.”
Brian’s watched Justin react, he withdrew into himself. Brian had brought up the idea of making an appointment with a counselor earlier in the week, and had been making some progress towards getting Justin to agree. All of his progress disappeared the second Jennifer mentioned it.
“I’m not going to see a counselor, I’m doing just F…” he glanced over at Brian. “I’m doing very well thank you all for caring.” Justin's voice was cold and clipped. “Hell Sunshine, you’ll be great, your stronger than anyone gives you credit for.” Deb broke in.
“I still think maybe you need to see a professional.” Jennifer said softly.
“Mother Taylor” Brian said, trying to keep his voice neutral. “Why don’t you just drop the counselor thing, it’s Justin’s decision.”
Jennifer sighed, but dropped the subject, recognizing that she’d hit a nerve.
And with that both Debbie and Jen turned their attention back to Brian.
Almost ten minutes later Justin couldn’t take it anymore, Brian’s patience was coming to an end, all the warning signs were there, his eyes dark, his jaw clenched and his expression blank, and getting more bland by the second. Everyone was so sure that he was crazy, that he was some little kid who couldn’t take care of himself. How did this become Brian’s fault, he was the one who fucked up. Justin pushed himself away from the table.
“I’m fine! Brian’s the reason I’m fine, maybe the only reason, and the two of you can’t leave him alone. Why don’t you leave us alone, just leave!”
Justin was almost crying, when he stormed off.
The scene struck a painfully familiar chord with Brian who followed Justin upstairs.
He found him sitting on the edge of the bed, crying, his body shaking. Brian put the violent thoughts about what he’d like to do to Deb and Jennifer to the back of his head as he sat down next to Justin. “You here?”
Justin looked up, wiping his eyes with the edge of his sweater. “What? Oh, yeah, I’m here.”
”Mothers, they just never give up.”
Justin gave a half smile “Why do they always blame you?”
“Cause it’s usually my fault?”
”Oh yeah, I forgot abut that.”
“Twat.” Brian pulled Justin against his side, “you want me to get rid of them?”
“You know they’re not going to leave until they see I’m okay.”
“I can get rid of them.”
“Brian you can’t have my mother and Deb killed.”
“Are you sure, I mean, I know people, who know people.”
Justin laughed again, leaning up to kiss Brian, “I’m fairly certain I don’t want them whacked.”
Brian leaned back against the bed, and Justin crawled on top of him, his need apparent in his every move and kiss.
Within moments, he pulled off his sweater, and then began to tug on Brian's. Brian raised his arms over his head to assist the blonde. Soon Justin was kissing down Brian's chest, nibbling and sucking on his abdomen, watching his muscles contract as he continued to kiss him.
Brian moaned, and pulled Justin back up to his mouth, grinding himself against the smaller man, feeling him respond with enthusiasm.
Justin climbed over Brian grabbing a condom out of the drawer, he returned, straddling Brian, and undid the man’s fly. When Brian's cock was free of his pants, Justin opened the condom wrapper with his teeth, and slid it onto Brian's stiff member.
Then he raised himself up on his knees, not feeling any residual pain, focusing on nothing but his immediate need, and as soon as he had lowered his pants enough he impaled himself on Brian, leaning forward to kiss him, and then sitting back up and riding him with an urgency they both felt. Before long Justin had his fist around himself, Brian's fingers intertwined with his as he came. Brian felt Justin's body convulse, and watched as he threw his head back in release, the tears gone, his eyes wide and his lips parted and red.
Brian came just moments afterwards as he thrust again into Justin.
It took another minute for Justin's breathing to return to normal. He leaned in and kissed Brian again, murmuring, “thank you” into his ear.
When they came back down to the dining room they both looked a little rumpled, but far more relaxed. Brian smiled and took his seat; Justin cleared the plates and took requests for coffee or tea.
As he was making the coffee Brian kept ear to the kitchen, but allowed the two women to chastise him a little longer before he interrupted them. “Justin’s doing his best, he just needs time, sorry if you feel left out but he’s a grown man, if he wanted to tell his mommy, he would have.”
Jennifer opened her mouth to reply but Brian interrupted her. “Excuse me while I go help Justin with the coffee.”
Deb looked at Jennifer and shrugged, “he’s got a point, Sunshine is a grown man.”
“He’s still my son.”
“And you know I feel like he’s mine too but what are you going to do? He’s got Brian, he’s always gonna turn to Brian.’
“You told me once Brian would finish with him.”
“I was wrong, Brian’s grown up recently too if you haven’t noticed, they kinda grew up together.”
Jennifer sighed, “He’s still my little boy.”
“I know.”
They sat in silence listening to the muffled clatter of dishes in the kitchen.
“You don’t think that they….” Jennifer trailed off.
”What, did a little fucking and sucking while they were upstairs? If they didn’t Brian’s changed more than I thought he could.”
Jennifer rested her head in her hands, “Am I ever gonna get used to this?”
Deb shrugged, “I don’t know, but if you don’t, you’ll never get to see your son, and is that what you really want.”
Face still in her hands Jennifer shook her head, and then straightened her shoulders and met Justin's smile with one of her own when he and Brian returned with the coffee.
“Brian, I’m sorry, I do trust you, and sweetie…” she turned her attention to Justin, “I just worry about you, I’m a mom, it’s what I do.”
Justin walked around the table and kissed her cheek. “Thank you.”
He leaned over and kissed Deb as well, “both of you.”
While Justin and Brian were facing the wrath of the mothers at brunch, Lindsay was dealing with her own issues, having agreed to meet Melanie for lunch. She left Gus with Michael and Ben, who were already watching JR and drove to the restaurant Mel had chosen, unsure of what to expect, or what she was going to say.
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