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The End Done Right
by Vamphile
Chapter Nine
“Why are we eating here?”
“Because I have to find some way to sell the idea of this ugly ass restaurant as a wonderful and fulfilling dining experience.”
“Well, wouldn’t that be easier if we didn’t actually have to be here?” Justin looked around, there is nothing attractive about this place, and it looks like every other stupid chain restaurant ever.”
“Yes, but this one is paying for the marble tile in the foyer and that hideous color scheme you chose for the great room.” Brian said as he draped his arm around Justin's shoulders and kissed the side of his face.
“You said you liked the color scheme.”
“I would have said anything to get you to shut up about it.”
Justin gave him a look and said, “well, if they’re paying for all that, I guess we can eat here, ONCE.”
Brian laughed and followed the hostess to their booth.
“Its not the diner”
“Nothing is, the diner isn’t about food, it’s about…” Brian trailed off
Justin looked at him…”it’s about?”
“Justin, did you know you’re brilliant?”
“Yeah, actually I did. Anything in particular make you come to this sudden realization?”
“I think I know how to market this shithole.”
“If anyone can do it, you can, so do we still have to eat here?”
“Shut up and order, we can’t eat at home, everything’s covered in dust.”
“The renovations are driving me insane you know.”
“The place is going to look great when it’s done.”
“But right now, they’re banging away all day, I can’t concentrate on my work, and the place is always so dusty, plus all those construction guys, with their big tools”
Brian cocked an eyebrow, “that’s a problem?”
Justin smiled “it’s a distraction.”
“But you finished the third canvas.”
“Yes, I did, and now I’m working on the fourth.”
“And will I ever get to see these masterpieces?”
“If you come to my New York Show.”
Brian seemed to consider it, “But we were just in New York.”
“It’s not for 6 months Brian, by then the spring collections will be in.”
“I thought you hated shopping.”
“I’d never been properly introduced to its more interesting side.”
It was Brian’s turn to smile. “Well, I’ll see if Cyn can clear my calendar for your show.”
“Well okay then.”
The food really was mediocre, but the pie was good, the place was known for its take out bakery, even more than for it’s food, or generic atmosphere, or lack thereof.
When they got back home Justin kissed Brian quickly “I’m gonna work a little more.”
“Bed by three.” Brian said
Justin smiled, “five at the latest, I promise.” Brian kissed him harder “three” and Justin went back to the studio, stripping off his paint free clothes and pulling on an old pair of sweats, he started mixing colors, searching for just the right shade of green.
Brian was in the den, working on the ideas he’d had at dinner. It was a departure from his usual pitch style, but he thought it might work. He tried not to focus on the fact that Justin's work habits hadn’t changed once they’d returned from New York. And Brian knew he was going to have to address how the kid was taking care of himself, and soon.
He had convinced himself in New York that the eating thing had been stress, and work, and maybe it was, but it hadn’t changed upon their return. Justin had barely touched his dinner tonight, he cooked Brian breakfast on the mornings he wasn’t in the studio, but Brian never saw him eat. Yes Justin always swore that he ate while he was cooking, but…
Brian poured himself a scotch, drank it, and then poured himself another. Justin wasn’t starving, he was fine, and he had been getting a bit more sleep, no more 24-hour marathons. Maybe the worst was behind them.
He was so engrossed in the work he was doing he lost track of time himself. When he did look at his watch it was 2:30 in the morning, he’d finished his pack of cigarettes, and half the bottle of scotch. Turning off the computer he walked over to the studio and knocked on the door.
“Half hour ‘til lights out.” he sing songed, trying to keep it light, he wasn’t Justin's keeper.
“Be up soon.” Justin called back, and Brian walked a little unsteadily upstairs and collapsed into bed.
Justin was curled up against him when he woke. “See” he told himself “nothing to worry about.”
He had only been at the office for twenty minutes when his cell rang, it was Justin
“Hey”
“Hey yourself.”
“You were supposed to wake me.”
“For what?”
“I was gonna make you breakfast”
“You needed your sleep, besides, I think Debbie gets upset if I don’t show up at least one morning a week for her bad coffee and nagging”
“What’s she nagging about now?”
“Guess”
“She wants to see the house.”
“We have a winner.”
“Everyone wants to see it. Daphne’s been hinting around for a preview too.”
“It’ll be done in time for the party in ten weeks, they’ll all see it then”
“Is it actually gonna be done? ‘cause at this rate, I’m thinking we go with urban dilapidated chic.”
Brian laughed, “it’ll get done or I’ll have jimmy buried under our floorboards by the contractor I hire to replace him.”
“Ooh, violent this morning.”
“Yeah well, I almost stepped on a fucking nail.”
“That’s why you’re supposed to wear shoes.”
“I hate shoes in the house, you know that. So I have a meeting with creative in ten minutes, do you need something?”
“No, just wanted to say good morning.”
“And a good morning to you too”
“Want me to bring home something for dinner?”
”I’m gonna be working, I’m getting a late start, I wouldn’t count on me eating”
”I never do” Brian mumbled, more to himself than to Justin
“What?”
”Nothing, grab a pop tart, and get to work, if you don’t finish these paintings soon I’m going to have to forbid you to be a creative artist type and send you off for a business degree.”
Justin laughed, “you wouldn’t do that, you’d miss my creativity.”
“Yeah, paint and turpentine is such a heady combination, what would my life be without it?”
“So you want me to become an accountant?”
Brian smiled, “No, I’ve got one of those, how ‘bout you become a doctor, then you can write me all the oxy prescriptions I need.”
“Doctors work worse hours than artists.”
“Good point, I guess you can stay creative, for now.”
Justin laughed again. “Love you”
“See you tonight.”
Brian closed his phone and smiled, he actually got turned on by the smell of paint and turpentine these days, but he’d wasn’t about to admit it.
Justin breathed deeply, pulling himself together.
He would never tell Brian the real reason that he called, he felt like too much of a baby, and after all that Brian had done for him, he wasn’t gonna fall apart now. But he felt like he was falling apart.
When he woke up, with a start, finding Brian gone he panicked, that same sickening feeling he’d known in New York, the same feeling he’d gotten when he had woken up with nightmares, after the bashing.
Sure that Brian was dead he had been unable to breathe. He had considered calling 911 but at that very moment hadn’t really cared if he lived or died, Brian was gone he was absolutely certain.
That’s the thing about panic attacks, they’re not rational, and so once it subsided somewhat, Justin gathered all his nerve and called Brian. He, of course, was fine; he was even in a good mood. Justin knew these episodes were silly, he also knew he never had one in the studio. And so without even showering, he went back to work on canvas number four.
Brian’s meeting with the art department went well, they figured they could get the art done and boards together by Monday, which meant he’d have tons of time to revise all their mistakes before the meeting on Wednesday. He glanced at his watch 12:30
“Cyn, I’m heading to the diner for lunch.” he called over his shoulder as he walked the few blocks. He took a deep breath, bracing himself before opening the door, He’d been scarce around the diner lately, and didn’t see any way of avoiding questions and nagging.
Michael was sitting with Emmett at a booth, he joined them.
“Afternoon boys.”
“Brian, honey it’s been ages, you look…well rested”
“Hello Emmett and NO, I did not go away to have work done as you’re implying, Justin and I took a shopping trip to New York.”
“Well, as long as you’re keeping him you might as well be keeping him in style” Michael said.
“I’m not keeping him, I’m fucking him, and letting him sleep next to me, and buying him things, in what sick twisted way is that keeping him?”
Michael rolled his eyes, “Jesus Brian, I know you’re good at denial but really.”
“Mikey?”
“Yeah?”
“Any chance we’re ever going to agree on this?”
”I doubt it.”
“Then how ‘bout you shut the fuck up about my life.” and with that he leaned over the table and kissed Michael on the mouth.
Michael smiled, “fine, we’ll agree to disagree. But I still don’t see why I can’t come and see the house.”
“Ooh,” Emmett added, “I am dying to see it, I hear it’s fabulous”
Brian sighed loudly, “at the moment it’s more frightening than fabulous, but don’t worry, it’ll all be done by in time for the housewarming party.”
Emmet clapped his hands “I love a good party.”
“Yeah, and when we get a little closer to this whole thing, I’m gonna need you”
“Anything you need Brian”
“Thanks”
“Hey Deb, any chance I can get a…”
Debbie arrived at the table and placed a plate in front of Brian “turkey sandwich, whole wheat, no mayo, and fries.”
Brian smiled, and put his hand on Deb's
“Thanks Deb.”
“No problem, so where’s sunshine today?”
“He’s working, he’s been spending a lot of time in his studio, the new show should be spectacular.”
“Well we all knew that kid was special, first time I saw him I knew it, didn’t I Michael.”
“Yes, mom, you knew he was the golden child.”
“Awe, my baby’s just jealous.”
“I’m not jealous now stop kissing me at the diner, I’m not 12 anymore either.”
Debbie just laughed and dropped the boy’s checks on the table, moving to pick up a few more orders to take to the lunch crowd.
“So, what’s new Mikey?”
“Not much, I was just telling Emmett that I’m going up to see JR, and Mel and Lindz this weekend.”
“Yeah I need to get up there, Gus broke his arm”
“I heard.”
“Hey Brian, has Melanie talked to you lately?”
”Why the fuck would she do that?”
“I don’t know, she seems off lately, weird, angry.”
“Lately? She’s always been weird and angry, she’s a lesbian, they’re born weird and angry.”
“Brian I’m serious I think something’s wrong.”
“If something were wrong Lindz would tell me.”
“Yeah I guess you’re right.”
“Besides you’re going up to see her, talk to her then”
“I don’t want to talk to her, she scares me.”
Brian laughed, “She scares all of us.”
Emmet laughed too and scooted out of the booth, “see you all later, I have an appointment with a couple who want a cowboy themed wedding”
“A gay couple?” Michael asked
“No, that’s the really weird part” Emmet did a full body shudder, threw a couple of bills on the table to cover his lunch and headed out.
“So you and Justin are back where you started?”
“Mikey, I asked you to drop it.”
“Right, sorry, anyway, I was asking because if you’re past your fear of looking like a couple, Ben and I were thinking the two of you could join us for dinner on Thursday.”
“As far as I know we’re both free, count on me, and if Justin can make it, we’ll both be there.”
“If Justin can make it? What the fuck would he have to do, he doesn’t have a job.”
Brian pinched the bridge of his nose and wondered why he didn’t hit Michael more than once a decade. “He has a show in 6 months, he has a job and a lot of work to do.”
“Whatever. I’ve got to get back to the store.”
“Bye Mikey.”
Michael leaned over and kissed Brian on the cheek before leaving.
Once they were gone Brian was actually relieved, and surprised at how much he’d been dreading facing them, maybe because it was harder than he’d like to admit to keep up the front that everything was perfect. Each day he was getting a little more concerned about Justin, and in a patented Brian Kinney method he was going to fix this, but he just hadn’t figured out which patented Brian Kinney method he was going to use.
He contemplated this while he finished his sandwich, and most of the fries. He was still sitting and contemplating when Deb slid into the booth across from him
“Christ my fucking feet are killing me today”
“Well, you could be a lady of leisure.”
“Fuck leisure, so, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong.”
“Mmmmmm hmmm, so if nothings wrong, why’d you eat the fries?”
Brian looked up at her
“comfort food asshole. You think I don’t know my boys. Mikey is upset he thinks about changing his hair, you…you go for the French fries.”
“Deb, can you do me a favor?”
“Sure kiddo, anything, you know that.”
“Yeah, can you call Justin, use your powers of persuasion, and get him to join you for lunch or something, get him out of the house.”
“You sick of him already? Brian If you’re tricking around on that kid again…”
Brian cut her off with a look. “He spends too much time in the studio, doesn’t seem all that interested in getting out of the house, for anything, I’d just like to get him pulled back into the fold, he’s too young to become a creepy old hermit.”
“You really worried?”
“No, I think he could just use the company, but Deb, don’t take no for an answer okay?”
“You got it Brian. Now, when am I going to get to see that house of yours?”
Brian smiled at her, “when everyone else does, so meet him someplace else.”
“Well you can’t blame a girl for trying.” The bell rang and Debbie got up to pick up the completed orders. “Take care of yourself Brian”
“You know me”
“Yeah, I do”
Brian placed a twenty on the table, tipping Debbie somewhere in the vicinity of 110% of the bill, but he always did that, and headed back to the office.
Justin was sitting in the studio and smoking, considering what to do next, canvas four needed a day to set before he could start the next step, and he had an idea for a smaller piece but he’d have to actually stretch the canvas for that one, and he wasn’t in the mood. There was a canvas ready for a portrait he’d already sketched out but he wasn’t sure his hand was up to doing the detail work.
“The scarf” as he’d entitled the third canvas, had given him a lot of trouble. He was always careful to run his hand under the shower jets for a long time after working on it, so that Brian wouldn’t see his hand cramped up like a gimp again. He knew that if Brian saw that he’d be even more insistent on the whole more sleep less painting thing and right now, it felt like the only thing keeping him from being a raving lunatic was the time he spent in the studio. He grabbed a bottle of water out of the mini fridge, and continued sitting and staring off into space, contemplating his next project when his phone rang.
It was Debbie.
He tried every excuse in the book, and she accepted none of them. There was no way to get out of it; he was having lunch with her tomorrow at her house. Justin tried to settle the knots in his stomach and couldn’t. He had no idea why he would be nervous about going to Debbie’s house but he suddenly was. He opened the studio door, found Brian's stash in the den and rolled himself a joint. He took it back to the studio and sat on the floor, door locked, letting the buzz wash over him.
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