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Superstar
by Vamphile
For Paddies
Chapter Eleven
It was a rough 24 hours but somehow they both got through it. Pots and pots of coffee, movies, games, and an occasional splash of water to the face kept Justin from sleeping, and once he was allowed to sleep for more than a couple of hours at a time they both crashed hard.
It was almost 12 hours later when Brian opened his eyes. He immediately turned to check on Justin but he found himself alone in bed.
He heard the water running and relaxed a bit, the kid was in the bathroom, he hadn’t taken off. Justin hobbled out and made his way to the kitchen, a grimace of pain on his face.
“You’re not supposed to be using you’re ankle.”
“I had to pee, and now I’m hungry.” He opened the ‘fridge and turned back to look at Brian. “You really don’t eat do you?”
“I told you, I don’t cook. Call for takeout.”
Justin nodded and pulled the menus from the drawer. “What do you want on your pizza?”
“Get whatever you want, I don’t eat pizza.”
“Well what do you want?”
”Get me a Caesar salad, dressing on the side.”
Justin rolled his eyes and placed the order, one large, extra cheese, pepperoni and a Caesar salad, dressing on the side
. “I’ve got to shower, I feel disgusting.” He said, hobbling back towards the bathroom.
Brian stood up, “Let me give you a hand.”
“I think I can handle it.”
Brian smirked, “Wet tile, and hopping around on one foot are not a great combo.”
“Yeah well if you had a tub like a normal person.”
“So now this is my fault?”
Justin’s teasing expression dropped immediately. “No, I didn’t mean that I just…”
Brian shook his head, the kid was over sensitive but there was no way he could blame him at this point and it WAS his fault. “It’s okay, I’ll give you a hand.”
Justin nodded silently and let Brian steer him towards the shower. He closed his eyes and hissed in pain as the water hit his face. The bruises looked even worse today, shiny, and still swollen, black and blue and a few tinges of deep purple in the center. Brian stood in front of the spray, blocking the water from hitting Justin directly. He carefully washed the boys body, running the soap lightly over the bruises and scratches that covered his chest and back, his legs and arms. He rubbed the shampoo in his hair lightly, cringing when the Justin whimpered a little as his fingers hit the large lump on the back of his head. Brian tried hard not to let his emotions get the best of him. But he was angry, each time he discovered a new bruise, or looked again at the myriad of marks on that perfect skin. He wanted to jump into his car, hunt down the bastard who’d done this and reciprocate. But instead he focused his attention on making sure Justin was steady on his feet, and clean.
Once they had both washed the previous day from themselves he guided Justin to the bedroom, where he gently toweled him off and replaced the brace for his ribs.
“Leave it off, it hurts.”
“Yeah, well it’s gonna hurt a lot more if it doesn’t heal, and we have to re-tape your fingers.”
Brian took out the supplied the hospital had given him, “Sit down.”
Justin allowed him to put the brace on and tried not to look at his fingers, they were purple, and the middle finger of his left hand looked misshapen. “At least I can still draw.”
Brian nodded, helping Justin into some clothes, and put the brace back on his ankle. He then picked the boy up and carried him to the sofa again placing his foot on the pillow on the table. Justin was trying to protest when buzzer alerted them to the arrival of their order.
Brian brought the food to the coffee table, opening his salad and watching amused out of the corner of his eye as Justin started to devour the pizza.
Justin caught Brian's look and blushed a little and then shrugged “I guess I was hungry, I haven’t eaten since…”
Brian smiled, “eat, you’re obviously starving.”
Justin grabbed another slice and before the hour was up had finished most of the pizza, there were two slices left, that he was absently picking the pepperoni off of when Brian brought up the topic that they’d both been avoiding.
“You can stay here as long as you want, but after your birthday, I really think you should go back to school.”
Justin closed his eyes leaning back against the couch. “Fine.” He had no intention of going back to school. No intention of sticking around Pittsburgh, but he couldn’t really go anywhere for at least a couple of days, so he humored Brian.
Brian knew that Justin had not given up that easily, but he let it go for the moment. There was nothing they could do for several weeks anyway.
Justin moved his head and flinched, every muscle in his body was screaming in pain. He had been too hungry to notice it, but now that he’d eaten, the only sensation left was the feeling that his body was one large throbbing bruise.
Brian handed him a pain pill and water bottle. “Now that you can sleep, you can take one of these.” Justin tried to nod, but grimaced instead. He swallowed the pill and within half an hour was asleep on Brian's lap, the undamaged side of his face buried in Brian's thigh.
Brian looked down at the mottled angry discoloration on Justin's face. It seemed to be accusing him, taunting him, and he wanted to scream. Instead he ran his hands through the soft blonde hair, gently running a finger along the edge of his jaw, tracing the red and black shapes that were more clearly defined today. Four welts, knuckles, two smudges, Fingers, A wide red and black splotch, palm print. Brian felt as if his body were tensed for the next blow himself as he mentally recreated the beating the boy had endured. The bruised the kid had received because he hadn’t been watching out for him.
He leaned his head back, trying to figure out how in a short week he’d become responsible for the kid and had accepted it. He couldn’t figure it out, all he knew was that something like this shouldn’t happen to anyone, especially not by the people who are supposed to love you.
Justin would survive; he’d proven since the first day they’d met that he was practically fearless, and smart. He’d get by, but for some reason, Brian didn’t like the thought of what he might have to do to accomplish that.
It might be due to his own story, maybe he related to this kid a little too much, there was a word for that…psychologists used it, but he couldn’t remember it right now. All he knew was that he’d made a choice, based on the best options available to him at the time, and it had worked out, but he wouldn’t recommend his path to anyone, and especially not this kid, this damaged, smart, beautiful, annoying, snot nosed twink of a kid.
“Ow.”
Brian looked down and realized his hands had involuntarily clenched into a fist, twisting Justin's hair around his fingers. He let go quickly, embarrassed.
“I’m allowed to sleep now, you don’t have to pull my hair to wake me up.”
Brian ran a hand softly through his own hair.
Justin moved his head a little settling back on Brian's thigh and closed his eyes again. His breathing was even and a small smile graced his lips, he was back asleep.
The week passed uneventfully. Justin pouted and tried to do too much, Brian hovered, and didn’t let him move more than was absolutely necessary. They were leaving to go for checkup the doctor had insisted upon, and neither was in a particularly good mood. There is such a thing as too much togetherness.
“Hopefully, he’ll give me some crutches and you can stop carrying me around the loft. I could even leave and go out by myself.”
Brian turned his head from the road for a second. “By yourself? How do you know your parents aren’t still looking for you?”
“I think they’re pretty much done with me.” Justin said quietly.
Brian nodded, not at all convinced, and not about to let the kid out of his line of vision. Every time he did that the consequences were disastrous.
The doctor tried not to show his surprise at seeing them. He’d expected them to skip the appointment, he’d expected them both to disappear as often happens with cases like these, but from the way the older man was hovering, and the attitude between the two. He wondered if his initial assessment had been incorrect.
After giving Justin a complete physical, with Brian pacing outside the door, obviously angry that he was not allowed to stay in the room, the doctor began to probe gently regarding the relationship between the obviously possessive older man and the hurt teenager on his table.
“Does he do this often?”
“Do what? Pace and worry? All the time.”
The doctor nodded, “have you gone to the police?”
”No point. It won’t happen again.”
“How can you be so sure.”
”Brian promised me.”
The doctor looked up, “he promised you.”
Justin caught the expression in the doctors eyes and realized what he was thinking. He became angry. “You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about. I told you before he didn’t do this, why won’t you fucking believe me?”
Brian heard Justin's voice raised in agitation and anger, and slammed through the door, doctors orders be damned.
Justin’s eyes caught Brian's and he smiled a little, his face hurt less now, the swelling completely gone, all that was left were the ugly bruises, which were now black and green, some with a slight tinge of yellow at the edges, and some deep purple in the center.
“Brian will YOU tell this guy that you didn’t do this to me, he won’t believe me when I say it.”
Brian's fists clenched, his jaw clenched, he wanted to punch the doctor but he had a feeling that would be less than persuasive in his “I didn’t beat the kid” argument.
“It wasn’t me, I would never do this to him, or anyone.”
The doctor nodded, as Brian came behind Justin and slowly wrapped his arms around his waist, low enough so that he wasn’t bothering the bruises or broken ribs that were still in the process of healing. He kissed Justin on the shoulder. “It doesn’t matter what he thinks, you know the truth.”
Justin nodded, “I know but he thinks I’d stay with you if you did this.”
Brian nodded, “He doesn’t know how smart you are, you’d never stay with someone who did this to you.”
Brian began to kiss Justin's neck, the boy leaned his head back on Brian's shoulder as he felt the warm hot kisses along his jugular, and just under his jaw. Brian swirled his tongue in a sensitive spot on Justin's neck and he giggled.
“I’d stay with anyone who did this to me.” Justin breathed.
“Anyone?” Brian smiled.
“Yeah, but you’re the only one that gets to me like this.”
Brian smiled again, broader this time. “I’d better be.” And he pulled Justin a little closer to him, no longer caring what the doctor thought.
The doctor cleared his throat. “Your bruises are healing well, and you seem to be doing much better. I’m going to allow you to use these crutches; they’re not the kind that go under your arms, which is better for your ribs. He showed Justin how to hook the crutches on to his arms and where to rest his hands. “Be careful of your fingers, which also seem to be healing nicely, and still, not too long on them, no more than twenty or thirty minutes at a time for this week, and I want you back here next week so we can make sure everything is healing as it should be. Keep the brace on unless you’re bathing, and the ankle cast as well.
They both smiled as Brian helped Justin down from the table. He was anxious to try out his new legs, but Brian insisted on using the wheelchair for now. “The doctor said not to over do it.”
Justin pouted, but knew it was pointless to argue. “Can we go out for lunch? We’ve been stuck in the loft forever.”
“Sure, the diner?”
Justin froze, and Brian realized what he’d said. “Hey, it’s okay, we don’t have to go back there.”
“No, we should, you go there all the time, and it’s close to the loft, and I won’t let my mom keep me from someplace just because she was there once.”
Brian nodded, relieved, he hoped Deb was working today; he’d like her to see what her helpful family reunification agenda had wrought.
Brian let Justin use his crutches to get from the jeep to the diner, and gritted his teeth as he saw the obvious pain the movements still caused in his ribs but the blonde was determined. Brian held the door for him and they headed towards and empty booth when Brian heard Michael and Emmett’s voices calling them over. He looked at Justin who shrugged and they both went to join Brian's friends.
Brian sat next to Mikey, and Justin sat across from him. “Give me your foot.”
Justin looked at him like he might be insane.
“Put it up on the bench, you’re supposed to keep it elevated.”
Justin nodded and moved his foot, Brian put in on the booth between his own knees and Justin leaned back, feeling some of the throbbing stop.
During the entire exchange Michael had been scowling and Emmett had been fluttering trying to find out what had happened. His hands were on Justin's face, “sweetie, you look terrible.”
Justin pushed his hands away “thanks.”
“What’d you do, get in a fight with a bus?” Michael asked.
Brian shook his head; maybe the diner had been a bad idea. Justin raised his eyes to meet Michaels. “I went home.”
Debbie had missed their entrance, but smiled when she heard the words. “Well good for you swee….”
Her mouth was open but no sound was coming out as Justin turned his head away from Michael and Debbie saw the condition of his face.
“What the hell happened to you sunshine?” she was crying, trying to hug the kid and hold him away from her and look at him at the same time.
“He told you Deb, he went home.”
Debbie looked up at Brian, seeing him for the first time, “His parents did this…I mean that’s why…” the picture became clear to Debbie who’s anger was quick and vicious. “That little cunt, comes in here all worried about her poor sweet baby boy, and takes him home and does this to him?” She was about to start again when Justin stopped her.
“It wasn’t her, it was my dad.”
“Doesn’t make it okay.” Debbie said, “How bout you sweetie, you okay?”
”Yeah, I’m fine, I just came from the doctors, he said everything’s healing really well considering it’s only been a week, and that maybe next week I can get a walking cast and ditch the crutches altogether.”
Debbie stood back, real tears in her eyes, “It’s been a week, Christ, you must have looked like hell a week ago if this is what you look like healed.”
Emmett was thinking the same thing. Brian just cringed with the memory of how he looked when he’d stumbled into his arms that night. He’d looked…. like he was going to die.
“He’s a tough kid.” Brian said, he’ll pull through, but if his mother asks…no one’s seen him.”
Debbie nodded, walking away.
“She didn’t take our order.” Justin said
“I think your meal may be on the house today sunshine.” And he was right.
When Debbie returned it was with a bacon double cheeseburger, chili fries, a milkshake and a huge piece of chocolate cake. She gave Brian a grilled chicken sandwich and fries. Eat your own fries; the kid here needs his strength to heal.
Brain closed his eyes, not sure which was worse, Deb's guilt, or her mothering, but he couldn’t stop either so he just watched Justin eat more calories than Brian would allow himself in a week.
“So, your dad huh?” Emmett said quietly, running his fingers through Justin's hair. Brian fought back the urge to physically remove Emmett’s hands, but just barely.
Justin shrugged, too interested in his French-fries to think about it too much. “He didn’t want me to be gay, acted like it was a choice. Got mad that someone might find out, you know, mess up his business or his golf game. I could have just agreed, not done anything at the house, or you know, pretended. I was stupid, I wanted him to… to you know, feel bad about who he was, cause that’s what he was trying to do to me. If I hadn’t done that, we probably would have been okay, but I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. So…”
Justin finished his little monologue by dipping his French fry into his chocolate shake and then popping the combo into his mouth.
Brian hadn’t heard him say it before, hadn’t actually heard Justin blame himself for what his father did. He knew that deep down, there was that feeling of guilt, but to hear Justin say it so matter-of-factly, as if his actions warranted his fathers reactions…
“That’s complete bullshit.”
Justin looked up surprised at the anger in Brian's voice.
Michael and Emmett were taken aback by his tone as well.
“It wasn’t what you said or what you did, it’s who you are, and if your father can’t deal with that, then what he did was his fault, nothing you said or did made this happen. Not your fault you’re fathers a vicious prick.”
Emmett wasn’t sure he’d ever heard Brian put so many words together at once. Justin had tears in his eyes. He believed what he’d said about his dad, about his being able to avoid the situation but not being smart enough to do so, but Brian was so sure, so adamant that it wasn’t his fault, for a moment he could believe it.
Michael just nodded in agreement with Brian. “Fathers can be assholes, you can’t blame yourself for the miserable shit your father does.”
Michael had known Brian forever, he’d given Brian this little talk himself a couple of times, and was glad to hear Brian repeating it to Justin, glad to know that Brian no longer held himself responsible for the bullshit Jack put him through.
Emmett wrapped an arm around Justin and said “sweetie, the greatest thing about being on your own is you can pick your new family for yourself.” He gave him another squeeze, “and you seem to have picked well.”
Brian smiled, whatever happened between himself and Justin, he’d like to think that the blonde could work his way into their little family. Deb would be good for him, and hell, even Mel and Lindz might have their uses. He hated to think of the kid alone, in some tiny crappy apartment, desperate for money, too much could go wrong.
Justin smiled a little and took a bite of chocolate cake. He wasn’t going to be in the Pitts much longer, if they wanted to think he was gonna just settle into their little “family” he’d let them, it was easier.
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