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Superstar
by Vamphile
For Paddies
Chapter Fifteen
Brian found a hotel in midtown and checked them into a suite. They hadn’t spoken at all in the cab. Justin was fidgeting, not sure what to expect, not sure if he was doing the right thing.
After a seemingly interminable elevator ride Brian closed the door behind them and they were alone.
Justin grabbed the remote off of the top of the television, and sat on the sofa channel surfing, trying not to look at Brian as he paced.
Eventually the older man sat down next to him, took the remote from his hands and turned it off.
“Why did you leave?”
“I explained that already.”
“Not really.”
“I left a note.”
“You left a fucking picture, with half a sentence at the bottom, that’s hardly an explanation.”
“Brian, you didn’t want me, you never planned this. I showed up and you took care of me, but you never meant to, you were never supposed to. I don’t want to fuck up your life too.”
Brian sighed and rubbed his hand across his face, he felt the stubble there. He hadn’t showered this morning…yesterday morning, when the fuck ever he’d first found Justin gone, and NOW the kid was worried about fucking up his life. “You weren’t fucking up my life.”
“I was. I fuck up everything. My life is too messy. I had to leave, and I had to give you back what you had before I made everything so complicated.”
“Everything’s complicated Justin. You don’t make it that way, it just is. You putting yourself in danger makes it more complicated, not less.”
“I wasn’t in any danger. Why do you keep thinking I’m this little kid who can’t cross the street on his own?”
“It could be because since I’ve met you, every time you’re out of my sight you end up in over your head.”
“That’s bullshit.”
“Really? I go to work; you go home, where you KNEW what you were facing. You go to work and end up doped to the gills and selling your ass. You take off for New York and when I find you, you’ve somehow managed to fuck up your ankle again, and are being scammed by the front desk clerk. Justin, you’re a smart kid, with absolutely no common sense.”
“Fuck you Brian.”
“Yeah, we’ll get to that later, I need something from you first.”
“What?”
“I need you to promise me that you’ll give me the full four months. I’d like to be able to sleep at night and know when I wake up, I won’t have to run all over the country trying to find you again.”
“Why can’t you just let me go?”
Brian stopped, frozen. It was a damn good question, why couldn’t he just let the kid go? He should, he knew that. The kid was nothing but trouble. He’d proven that time and time again, but… “I don’t know, I just can’t.”
“You have some kind of hero complex, you know that right?”
Brian smiled, “I probably do, why don’t you just take advantage of it for a little while.”
“Because it’s time for me to stand on my own.”
“You can’t even stand right now. I should probably have taken you straight to a doctor for your fucking ankle. Are you even wearing the brace for your ribs?”
Justin looked down at his hands.
“Didn’t think so.” Brian said. “Look, I know, I really do, how much you want to just be on your own, but it’s not what it’s cracked up to be. You can’t go home to your family, but that doesn’t mean you have to do this alone. It’s not safe.”
Justin rolled his eyes. Brian was getting frustrated.
“Fucking hell Justin, can’t you just be a kid for a little while longer, finish school, take advantage of some of the opportunities you have? Why are you insisting on throwing your entire fucking life away when you don’t have to?”
Justin looked up surprised at Brian’s outburst. He knew he’d angered the man but his vehemence was still startling. “I’m sorry.”
Brian tried to control his anger, tried to swallow the fear he felt. “Justin, will you promise me?”
“I have to go back to school?”
“I really think you should.”
“Can I get a job?”
“At the gap?”
“What is it with you and the fucking Gap?”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yeah, but I want my own money, I don’t want to depend on you for everything.”
“Fine, so you get a normal after school job…once you can stand without pain.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Okay, I’ll stay for four months.”
Brian nodded. “Have you eaten?”
Justin shook his head. “I was too tired yesterday.”
“I’ll order some room service, and then I’m going to take a shower…want to join me?” Brian cocked an eyebrow and Justin smiled.
Justin had forgotten how beautiful Brian looked naked. Or had tried, but the moment he saw him peel off his clothes he was torn between wanting to kiss him everywhere and wanting to grab a sketchbook and try again to capture his grace and strength on the page. He settled for leaning back against him in the shower, letting the hot water wash away the smell of the past few days.
Brian held Justin against him. His arm around the blonde’s slim waist. He focused on NOT thinking about why they seemed to fit so well together. Instead he moved his mouth against the curve where his neck met his shoulder. He felt Justin shiver at the sensation. He moved his hand slowly down his chest, and heard as well as felt Justin’s breathing change.
Justin tried to focus on something other than Brian's hands; long fingers moving agonizingly slowly down his torso, heading towards his already throbbing erection. He instinctively moved his own hands behind him, pulling Brian closer.
The moment Brian felt Justin's small hands on his hips, and then lower, pulling him closer, bringing his hard cock to rest on the crack of his perfect bubble butt he lost all concentration and patience.
He grabbed the condom he’d pulled from his jeans before starting the shower and pulled back from Justin only enough to roll it on.
Justin whimpered when he felt Brian's body move away from his. Then he felt the chestnut hair against his shoulder blades. His forehead pressing into his back.
He put his hands against the tiled wall of the shower and moved his feet apart. Brian's hands covered his, their fingers intertwining as he felt the blunt head of his cock against his waiting hole.
Brian pushed in, trying to maintain some semblance of composure, but the moment he breached the first ring of muscle he lost it. He pushed into him completely. “Christ Justin, you’re so tight, so hot.” He whispered into the blonde’s ear as he thrust against him.
Justin was pushing back, reveling in the burn and pinch of being filled by Brian. It had only been two days, he’d missed this. Justin tried to move his hand, to grasp his own hard on; he wanted to come, while Brian was inside him. Needed to. Brian, feeling the boys hands try to extricate themselves from his grip, held tighter. “Not yet Justin.”
Justin leaned his head back onto Brian's shoulder and moaned. “Close Brian,”
“I know, just let it go.”
And he did. He lost himself to the feel of the hot water sluicing down their bodies. Of the shocking jolt of indescribable pleasure when Brian rolled his hips and changed his angle, of the glorious feeling of safety when he eventually released his hands and wrapped his long tanned arms around his pale body and held him close, his feet practically lifting off the tile with each pump of his hips.
Brian gently cupped the kids balls, rolling them around, feeling his body shudder against him as his hand finally wrapped around his thick hard shaft. He stroked, squeezing a little and running his thumb across the slit on each upstroke, causing Justin to gasp and whimper.
“Brian, I’m gonna…. aruuggghhhh”
Brian smiled at the sound as he pushed in again and fought against Justin's spasms, which were trying to push him out. He stayed inside his hot tight channel. Letting the feel of his ass clamping down on him pull his own orgasm to the surface. He came, biting Justin's shoulder, pulling his body even closer. They were both out of breath; hearts racing when Brian leaned himself back against the wall for support, taking Justin with him.
After several moments they completed the actual getting clean portion of the shower and were just emerging in matching hotel supplied robes when a knock at the door announced that room service had arrived.
Justin was laying on the bed, spent, damp and freshly fucked when Brian wheeled the cart in.
He sat up quickly, his earlier lethargy forgotten at the prospect of food.
He finished half a club sandwich in seconds while Brian watched, amused. Justin blushed.
“I was hungry.” He said around a mouth full of fries.
Brian sat next to him, realizing that he was actually hungry as well. He picked up a triangle of sandwich and began to pick it apart, removing the mayonnaise and half the bacon.
“You should eat more, you’re too skinny.”
“The camera adds ten pounds.”
“What’s Chaz gonna do with the stuff we filmed?”
“He’s working it into a film, making it a short or something.” Brian looked over at Justin who had suddenly stopped eating. “What’s wrong?”
“I guess I never really thought about other people watching it.”
“Does it really bother you?”
“Doesn’t it bother you?”
“Not really, it pays the rent.”
“I know not now, but didn’t it ever.”
Brian shrugged, “maybe, but it was a long time ago. I did what I had to do. Just like you did. Nothing to be ashamed of.”
Justin nodded, trying to put it out of his head. “I guess.” He munched on another fry thoughtfully. “If I gave Chaz back the money, do you think he’d um…?”
Brian shook his head. “That movie could have made you a star, and it’s gonna make Chaz millions, I don’t think there’s anything that could get him to part with it.”
Justin’s shoulders slumped a little.
“Hey, it’s okay, no one you know is going to see it, and you were great.”
“I was horrible.”
“Well, you couldn’t remember your lines, but you were a natural.”
“You kept distracting me, that’s why I couldn’t remember my lines. And I was not a natural, I didn’t know what I was doing, if you hadn’t have been there…I would have been a wreck.”
“But I was there.”
“Lucky for me.”
“Lucky for ME.” Brian smirked. He leaned in to kiss Justin’s ketchup stained lips.
“I think we both got lucky that day.” Justin mumbled as he fell back against the mattress and Brian's body covered him. Their robes fell open and his skin responded to Brian's touch instantly.
When they finally slept they were both sated and exhausted.
Justin awoke at five at night. He’d slept most of the previous day but Brian hadn’t. He wanted to go out, he’d been stuck inside small rooms for two days but he had promised Brian he wouldn’t take off again. If he left and Brian woke up…he didn’t want to think about what Brian would do, or how angry he’d be.
His phone rang.
Brian woke up at the sound of the phone. He watched as Justin’s body stiffened.
“No.”
“I told you I didn’t need a place that badly.”
Brian’s body was tense watching Justin's reaction to the phone call.
“Thank you for your suggestions, but I’ll be fine.” He hung up the phone.
“Who was that?”
“Someone I’d called about a place.”
“What did he want?”
Justin sighed. “He wanted me to blow him. I went there, he tried to get me to suck him off. I told him no. He called to give me a second chance at the room for rent.”
“What’s his name?”
“Why?”
“Where was this place?”
“It doesn’t matter Brian. Seriously, you don’t have to beat up everyone who wants me. I really can take care of myself.”
“Did he…”
“He didn’t do anything, he offered, I said no and left. Can’t blame a guy for trying right?” Justin shrugged.
“Is that how you hurt your ankle.”
“Brian, could you please stop trying to blame this on someone so that you have something to attack? I tripped, I really did. This guy had nothing to do with that. I tripped. I found a cheap hotel room, and I figured in a couple of days I’d find a job and a place to stay.”
“But I found you first.”
“Yeah, you did.”
“So now you have a place to stay, and you don’t need a job.”
“I’m still getting a job.”
Brian harrumphed. “You don’t need one.”
“I do if I want to go to school next year.” Justin had no intention of going to school but he knew it would shut Brian up. He was right.
Brian wasn’t sure the kid was serious. He was probably lying just to shut him up. He let him win this time.
“Hey, do you think now that my parents are finished with me I could work for Chaz again?”
“No.”
“You don’t think Chaz would let me? He told me when the whole thing died down to give him a call.”
“Justin, is that really what you want to do? A couple of hours ago you were upset at the thought of your first film being released, now you want to make another one?”
“It pays a hell of a lot better than the gap.”
Brian reminded himself to talk to Chaz, make sure he didn’t hire the kid again. He’d find a way to ensure it…even if it came down to an ultimatum.
“Lets go to the museum.”
Brian looked at him like he might be drunk. “What?”
“I’ve always wanted to go to the MOMA and we’re in New York, and…”
“Fine.”
Brian pulled on his jeans and realized that they were in desperate need of laundering. “We’ve got to stop somewhere first. I need clothes that I haven’t been wearing for 72 hours.”
“I haven’t been gone that long.”
“Yeah but these were on the floor from the other day when I put them on…and I spent the night in La Guardia.”
“You never did tell me how you found me.”
“All in good time. Lets start here. Give me my credit card back.”
Justin blushed as he handed it back to him. “I didn’t mean to use it, I only wanted to confirm the flight, and I paid…”
“I know, honest thief, we’ve covered that…you know what…keep it. Just in case of emergencies. ACTUAL emergencies, not your strong desire to go get yourself hurt
.” “Brian I can’t.”
“Keep it, I’ll feel better knowing you have it.”
“You just want me to leave a paper trail.”
“I don’t want you to leave.”
“Well, okay, I’ll keep it if we can go to the museum.”
“Lets go.”
Shopping was something Brian did meticulously. That was hard to do with Justin tugging at his sleeve asking him to hurry up, so he went with basics. Levi’s a t-shirt and clean socks. He bought a few other things in case they stayed longer and shoved his old clothes in a separate bag.
“Can we go now?”
“Yes.”
“Finally.”
“That is the shortest time I’ve ever spent shopping.”
“It’s the longest I’ve ever spent. Christ you are pickier than my mom.”
The museum was open late, there was a new exhibit, and Brian eventually gave up and sat on the wide bench in the middle of the room while Justin viewed each piece from every possible angle.
They finally left when the museum was closing. Justin seemed calmer, more at peace.
“I wish I could paint.”
“Why can’t you?”
‘It’s too expensive, and messy, my father put up with the cost of sketch books and stuff, but canvas and paint, not to mention the supplies… I tried once, he made my mom take it all back.”
Brian nodded, trying to think of new and fun ways to kill Craig. He had no patience for anyone who had no patience for Justin these days.
They stopped for dinner and Brian was listening contentedly while Justin chattered on about his friend Daphne, his sister molly, his summers at camp etc. Brian somehow felt better knowing that all of Justin's childhood hadn’t been awful. He had imagined Craig to be far more controlling, far more like his own father, but Justin had a seemingly endless supply of happy memories.
After dessert, and a second bottle of wine they walked arm in arm back towards the hotel. Justin was too far-gone to do anything more amusing than pass out once Brian unlocked the door.
He sat, watching the boy sleep, his shape barely discernable in the dark room. His mind was pitching tough questions, and he had no idea what the answers might be.
Why did he care? When did he start caring? What was he doing? What was he going to do? Had he really just committed the next four months of his life to raising a teenager? Did he mind? Who was he and what had happened to Brian fucking Kinney?
He lay on his back, his head still spinning with questions. Justin turned in his sleep, wrapping his body around Brian’s. Resting his shoulder on his chest. Throwing a leg over his. Brian slept, the answers unimportant for the moment.
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